Saturday, 9 April 2011

A change of plan

Pickle Missy and Little Guy are off to stay with their dad and his new family for a week. This is what happens when he has annual leave now. And its all kinds of awkward, and it gives me a sad face, but it must be done. He was good enough to provide them with wonderful Grandparents, and I know how important that bond is, and how much the children miss the two of them, so I can only hope that they have a wonderful time, full of pleasures and lovely memories. Lucky babies :)

So I will be struggling to be my bouncy self over the next week, but I must try and re-coup, and look on the bright side. Its actually a pretty lucky position to be in: the 'break', such as it is, is needed if I'm honest. And because being without them is hard work, and lonely-making, I do tend to try and get outta here. I usually migrate like a bird in winter to the bright lights of London, where the parentals and friends are.

Plan A
'Lets go away' says my lovely fella, 'Ooh that sounds nice- but nothing too far or expensive', says I.

Well the job that he took on was due to finish on the Friday, and I somehow knew it wasn't sensible to rely on that, his work being what it is. No surprise to me that he isn't finished, (I don't think men's minds work quite like that- I think he was a little taken aback!) but nevermind, for I hatched an alternative plan.

Plan B
To go to see the family for the weekend.

Errr, which weekend? Oh, no, actually, I can't do either. The children weren't due to leave until the Saturday of one, and it would appear that I am helping out on both Sundays, doing that thing that I do voluntarily, as their regular person is away for a fortnight. It takes prep too, so I'll be quite busy, you know... prepping. (I probably ought to consider giving away more info here, because I'm making this sound quite under-wraps-exciting, which it really isn't!..)

Plan C
Take work on myself, as much as I can, throughout the week, as I'm in a grump that the fella appeared to be very busy himself. and I had nothing else to do.

I now couldn't go away at either end of the week. So what was the point of going away in the middle?! (Theres logic there somewhere). So I offered to be available for those that needed me, and found myself being extra accomodating to other people's Easter plans, and agreeing to work Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Nice spread-out commitments, you see, with only a couple of hours on each day. Poop. Or is this a good thing?

I am left with a week of plans dotted around, and nothing substantial to look forward to, and nobody, really, to spend time with. I am a glutton for punishment. But I suppose as I have things to save up for (not least the period of No-Work for the other school breaks, and the hundreds of Bank Holidays that a self-employed-girl always appreciates...) it wasn't a bad way for things to go. Lets accept it for what it is.

To be positive, I have some projects to get started, and lots of Spring Cleany Sorting Thingys to do, and charity shop runs to make, and I can get out on my bike, or run everyday without concerns of childcare. It might be good for me to have time to play 'houses', and move things around, and work on the garden.

But wait- what appears to be missing? Company! I'm gonna be a sad old lady humming to herself! As yet, I've made no plans with anyone to socialize, and the thought of doing so, scares me. My friends are back in London, and places nearby to London. Yes it appears that I have settled my chidren into their lives here, and have forgotten to do the same for myself. The joys of being self-employed are many, but it does mean that I work by myself, with children, all of whom are too young to go out for a friendly cider with me. I have friends that I used to work with, two of whom are away, and all of whom live 12-15 miles from here. I don't have transport, and in most cases, neither do they.
The people I know Here are mostly parents of Little People, or people that I say 'hi' to (but who I also don't really know). Many of these will be on their holidays too. But enough of the reasons why its difficult- if it was easy I would have stuck around here whenever the children were away before, and attempted this already. I need to start somewhere.

Wheres a 'meet new people that you're not interested in dating' site when you need one?! My plans have decided for me- I might just have to take the plunge. Wish me luck!



  1. Hello! I know what you mean about being far away from everyone. Cant offer any advice but I know what you mean!
    I dont know anyone here really other than people I work with and everyone is so busy with their own lives / friend groups its really difficult and then when you find a group to join, you have to pluck up the nerve to go (not easy when you have been in a negative relationship previously)

    Good luck with taking the plunge!

    megan x

    PS love the post about *the* wedding!

  2. It's true - making friends is very hard once you're past a certain age, when people are all settled into their own friendship groups. Not sure where 'Here' is, but there's a website,, where you put in your postcode and it will come up with all the social groups near you - some are for specific things like photography or walking but some are just groups of people looking for people to socilise with. Failing that though, try to embrace the alone-ness, like you say, do all the things you can't normally do because of childcare issues. The week will fly by! xx

  3. I know what you mean about wanting a website to meet people that don't date! As a lot of my friends are coupled up I sometimes find myself at a loss at weekends... whilst I enjoy my own company sometimes you think I just want someone else to talk to!

    Victoria xx

  4. Sorry to hear about your change of plans. It's not very helpful and I don't like to think of you all alone. Is there some stuff on your 30 list that you could do to occupy your time? I'm sure the pickles will be back in what seems like no time. I think you should treat yourself to a long bubble bath accompanied by a glass of wine and a glossy magazine! x